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- You automatically already know how to "just be yourself," but if you make a conscious project out of it, you're outsourcing the job in a way that won't actually help you perform it better.
- It's like telling someone at the gym to "just be strong" instead of giving them a workout plan.
- And though there are obvious downsides to this, one constructive is that it could educate you life abilities you would not otherwise have discovered so quickly.
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So instead of thinking about how you are behaving and trying to make sure that you are "being yourself," address your attention to the other person, and the situation you are dating advice for singles. Being curious and present, and immersing yourself in the moment, are great ways to get out of your own head.
To fix your attention on something that usually happens automatically like blinking or being yourself will mess that automatic process up, simply because the brain is not designed to consciously help with that.WHY AM I STILL SINGLE? (Introvert Dating Advice)
The effort gets in the way. This is why we often make clumsy mistakes that would never happen otherwise when we feel nervous.
You automatically already know how to "just be yourself," but if you make a conscious project out of it, you're outsourcing the job in a way that won't actually help you perform it better. Try this instead: Don't get in the way of automatic skills like using your hands, constructing sentences and making eye contact. Instead, trust your ability do so without thinking about it.